Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Do Golden Cows Make Golden Bull$%!#?

The Golden Globes have been canceled due to striker solidarity and star no-shows. The President of the Hollywood Foreign Press Association said:

We are all very disappointed that our traditional awards ceremony will not take place this year and that millions of viewers worldwide will be deprived of seeing many of their favorite stars celebrating 2007’s outstanding achievements in motion pictures and television.

Bull. The operative phrase there is "seeing... stars." The pretense that this or any other such Hollywood ceremony is a celebration of excellence in artistic achievement is nonsense. "But I want to see who wins!" No you don't. You want to see what they say and what they're wearing if they win. Does anyone truly care about who wins? Can anyone remember more than a few of the winners from last year? I doubt it.

Everyone just wants to watch the ritual, no one cares about the content (insert cynical anology about organized religion here). Don't get me wrong. Ritual is important. I love watching the Oscars, but I don't pretend to attach any significance or meaning to its "content."

What bugs me most is the obvious commercialism of it though. If the ceremony itself, the "tradition" as the HFPA calls it, were truly that sacred, then it would go on, with absent nominees, even if the network weren't interested in televising it. But no, it's not even happening in a private party. It's just being replaced with some paparazzi tabloid TV programming (so they'll announce winners... big deal). Hollywood can make money and bull$%!# walk and talk hand-in-hand.

HFPA, stop pretending you care about celebrating excellence more than putting on a pageant. As Judge Judy says, "Don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining." The Globes don't offer many technical awards, but the Oscars are threatening cancellation too. If the Academy is as devoted to "celebrating outstanding achievements" as the HFPA, then they'll go ahead with the show so that the exceptionally talented sound mixers, cinematographers, FX artists, designers, etc. not on strike can have their night in the sun. Any bets on what the chances of that ceremony taking place are? That's what I thought.

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